How To Stay Calm When Taking Twins Out Alone

Some days, I feel like Super Mom, expertly juggling everything to give my twins full, well-rounded childhoods. Other days, it feels like all my shortcomings are front and center. Like a spectator sport for curious onlookers, under a spotlight that always seems follow twin moms.

It’s enough to deter you from attempting anything beyond essential outings. Even then, only with curb side pickup. It’s hard to imagine a stress-free outing with twins is even possible. I promise you, it most certainly is. Not every day, not every destination, and defininately not in the way you were used to before twins. But with a bit of planning, a mindset shift and managing your expections, you are capable of getting out (even alone) with twins.

1) Baby Bag is always Stocked on Standby

Your baby bag should always be in a perpetual state of readiness. You can snatch and go with full faith that everything you need is packed and prepped for a successful outing. I don’t advise trying to route through and restock with two little ones fussing in their car seats or little hands trying to help. Almost certainly, you’re setting yourself up to be late or forgetting a change of clothes on the coffee table.

Whats in our baby bag?

2 Glass Bottles (pre-filled breast milk)
Cold Pack
2 Burp cloth
5 Diapers, Wipes, Travel rash cream, foldable changing pad
Disposable doggy bags
2–3 neutral outfits
2 cardigans & weather appropriate hats
3 Drool Bips
2 Lightweight blanket
Teething toys
Baby sunscreen stick

Extras for Momma

Water bottle & snacks
Headphones (for podcasts and phone calls)
Change purse
Makeup Bag: mini concealer, lip gloss, travel hair brush, hair ties

Packing a baby bag for twins is a balancing act. You want to feel well prepared to enjoy the day without feeling like a pack mule. Before my twins, I read a lot of diaper bag packing essential lists that felt more like packing for a weekend getaway than a trip to the park with optional shopping detour on the way home. There is such a thing as too prepared. Pack too much, and you’ll find yourself rummaging through the diaper bag, frantically unzipping pockets and emptying half of it onto the floor just to find what you need. This setup is our sweet spot, just enough that gives me peace of mind for almost any between nap outting- and with twin, anything more is just setting yourself up for meltdowns and burnout.

Here’s the what and why of our twin’s everyday diaper bag:

Feeding Essentials

2 Glass Bottles (pre-filled breast milk) + Cold Pack
I tandem breast fed my twins until 3 months. After that, it was too difficult to get them into position without one imposing on the other’s meal. Having prepumped milk on hand brought so much flexibility to our outings, and soothed the hungry twin waiting in queue for the breast. Most baby bags have an insulated pocket to keep bottles cool. Like many twins, mine suffered from horrible re-flux until their first birthday. I pack 2 Burp Cloths that would need changing out after every outing. Formula option: 3 Glass Bottles (pre-filled with water) + Pre-ratioed formula. That extra bottle is good insurance for unexpected spitting up or spillage.

Diaper Essentials

5 Diapers, Wipes, Travel Rash Cream, & Changing Pad
Five is a reliable number of diapers to cover double changes and the occasional sacrificial 30-second diaper. Our outings rarely go past three hours anyway. If I’m staring down a fifth diaper change in that time, I’d just call it a day and regroup. Since this will be your most reached for items, I highly recommend a Foldable Diapering Pack you can easily pull in and out of your bag. Disposable Doggy Bags are my favorite diaper bag hack. Not only is it thoughtful to bag a dirty diaper before disposing of it at community centers or a friend’s house, sometimes you find yourself with no trash bin within reach- like a public park or the beach. These are also perfect for transporting soiled clothing until you get home.

Clothing Staples

2–3 Neutral Outfits – For blowouts, spit-ups, and unexpected conditions. Neutral is best so you don’t have to replace the entire outfit if some pieces survive. Include a size up so these clothes can remain in your bag without fear of being too small. To this I like to add 2 Upsized Cardigans (I LOVE dressing my boys like little old men) in case of surprise cool spells, or public spaces with excessive A/C. 2 Hats would be rotated in depending on the season (and occasionally the holiday) up until they stopped tolerating summer hats (around 8 months).

Comforts

2 Knitted Blankets – Practical to protect against the cold, or impromptu tummy time under a shady tree. Since we would go for walks daily in nicer weather, I invested in a Baby Sunscreen Stick. My blonde boys are very fair. Sunscreen in a stick is easy to apply, less messy and seems to carry a novelty factor the twins enjoy. Its also good insurance when out for sunny walks. A stroller canopy may not be able to provide sun protection from all angles. If your twins use Soothers, have an extra two pack tucked away in the bag. Same goes for Teething Toys. Even if you have it latched to their clothing, its saves a lot of peace of mind to know you can simply reach for a replacement to sooth a fussy baby rather than frantically searching their carrier at check out.

Extras for Momma

Water Bottle & Snacks: Even if I eat before going out, I know I need to unload, change, feed (possibly change again) and likely put them down for their nap before I can even get started on preparing my meal. Continuous hydration and grazing throughout the day is the only way to keep my calories up and milk supply from nose diving. Headphones: That quiet time to lock in a phone call was almost exclusively while driving, or listen to a podcast with pushing the stroller on long walks. This is how I carved out slices of me time. I don’t usually grab my wallet when I’m just walking around the neighborhood, but I like to have a little Change Purse on hand—just in case. I also have a makeup bag to refresh my look. Mostly as a security blanket.

2. Suit Up Before The Chaos

Just like the baby bag, you want yourself to be in a state of readiness to run out the door once the trifecta of freshly napped, freshly changed, and freshly fed is unlocked. You are setting yourself up for success well before the twins reenter the picture.

When you’re already sleep-deprived (I will confidently assume that you are), it’s tempting to try and bank every possible minute in bed. But in reality, that short-term pleasure is sabotaging your day and your mental well-being.

Wake up with the intention that those first 15 minutes of the day are designated self-care time. Get dressed, fix your hair, perhaps a little lip gloss if you’re feeling glamorous. I promise—this is not about putting on airs for other people. It’s about creating a mental shift to tackle the day and prioritize yourself in the midst of chaos of twins.

This small shift makes a massive difference. When the day inevitably spirals into a blur of feedings, rocking, dishes, and delayed trips to the restroom, those 15 minutes of self-prioritization help you feel just a little more grounded, a little more in control and a lot more like yourself.

3. Manage Expectations

Becoming a twin mum completely reshapes your world. Suddenly, two tiny humans depend on you for everything. That first year is all about gently merging everyone’s needs into one cohesive schedule, while coming up with creative ways to stay on top of the day to day tasks of running a household. I didn’t want to write off that first year as just a blur of feeding, changing, rocking, and cleaning. I wanted us to enjoy it, not just survive it. For me, part of that meant continuing to get out into the world, even with two babies in tow.

Because of my husband’s long and unconventional work schedule, I was solo parenting most of the time. That meant I was the one packing the diaper bag, buckling both babies into car seats, managing last-minute blowouts or meltdowns as we headed out the door, and unloading it all again when we got home.

Very quickly, I had to to reign in my expectations of what a productive day out looked like. am generally a master of multitasking —always trying to maximize efficiency. Gas is expensive, time is limited, so why not grab a bag of milk on the way home from mommy-and-me yoga? And hey, the hardware store is just a quick detour, right?

Wrong.

That mindset will drain your energy fast and leave you with two cranky babies stretched beyond their nap or feeding window. Even with a well executed routine, it’s still a big production. Set up the stroller. Unload Twin 1. Then Twin 2. Hook on the diaper bag. Wrestle the door open, and navigate your baby bringing behemoth of a stroller through the isles. Smile politely, perhaps entertain a couple unsolicited comments from curious gawkers . Check out. Then load it all back in the car in reverse. What used to be a quick errand now takes triple the time and energy—not to mention the physical toll.

The biggest lesson I’ve learned? Keep it simple. One outing, one mission. And if it all falls apart? Cut your losses and try again another day.